away.

i cannot wait.

to get away. tomorrow morning at 9am i'm off.

yes, it's the usual trip but i'm ready for a break. i can't sit around here any longer.

i want to get in the car, sit back and listen to good music whilst taking photos of the unknown.

i am going to sit on the beach everyday and enjoy the quietness that is of klein brak.

time for me. and i am very grateful for that.

i'm ready for an adventure.

in other news . . .

happiness.

love.

friendship.

family.

a beautiful camera.

ankle boots.

i do love christmas.

...more than anything.

much needed.

last night was a night bound to come sometime soon.

a full blown confrontation sesh happened. and it was very much needed.

a quiet supper until one point was argued against another.

the tears began and once home there was a "meeting" upstairs.

an hour and a half later it felt like we got somewhere if nowhere.

we're going in to a christmas with many factors.

everyone needing everyone at some point.

we need to realise what is truly the most important for christmas this year and not have any burdens.

yes, i feel sorry for you BUT you need to engage more with this family and not just one person otherwise this christmas will not work out. you need to break free somewhat.

if you want to leave your children behind over christmas, do so. yes, they were invited but why would they want to suddenly join another family for chirstmas 4 hours away whom they've never met. FAIR.

i don't believe it's right but then again, people deal with issues their own way. and you're all boys. none of you may talk to each other about "feelings" like us girls do but i hope you do someday.

i pray that you can become a whole family again,be with each other and not feel dependent on always coming here.

gee the timing was all off in this situation.

a stunner*

wow. words can't even describe what i felt last night.


it was the perfect evening.

vickismith. thank you. the whole evening spent on the coolest invention EVER-a trampoline. talking rubbish about sims, website logos, sport cars and hyper cars. small minds being amused by small things like cups and bowls. learning more about some people. and helping one another. having tickling attacks. finding peoples weak spots. realising that there's more going on than we think. BUT we were all with one another-on this little trampoline. and it was all i needed.

(i book the trampoline on newyears vickismith)

                we then proceeded on a spontaneous trip with whoever was left at the house.
                                             the sounds of michael buble at 22:00
                             while travelling amongst the city lights on boyes drive.

arriving at the harbour. fisherman all out catching their daily fish. dedication i tell you.

the long walk down the promenade. vicki and glenn getting that adrenaline rush as you look down in the dark empty sea wondering "what if?".

          we lay there.

                   on the edge of the promenade. all our feet hanging off.

                      the dark sea below us rushing against the harbour walls.

             we all lay there.

thoughts rushing through every mind. and talking COMPLETE rubbish-

i can't even remember what it was about.

but it was full of laughter.



it's what i needed. and to make it even better, it began to rain. and we all lay there in the rain (me being on the end so having to shelter everyone). but we didn't care. we lay there. put our hoodies and scarves around our heads and waited for the storm to pass.

and it did. it left a "foggy london town" look afterwards. and it was beautiful.

it quite honestly is my new favourite place. so what if i was sick and potentially worsened my condition being in the rain and all (while wearing shorts). it was worth every minute. i needed it.

it was perfect.

xxx